Selfish Life

Give Up Day: Shame of Past Failures

I currently have a thirty-day self-care challenge going on. My wonderful subscribers and I have made it to week 4; Day 22 to be exact. Each week there is a give up day. Give up days encourage you to let go of mindsets or behaviors that are hindering you. One of the most impactful give up days for me has been give up day: shame of past failures. When I shared this with my subscribers I received some powerful feedback, so I decided to share with everyone.

 Everybody makes mistakes, and everyone has failed at some point in their lives.

I’ve failed at several aspects of my life relationships, school, money management, being a friend, there’s a shit ton of other things I’ve failed at, but If I include them all you’d be stuck here for a while. Let go of what happened in the past. Recognize the difference between where you were then and where you are now. I guarantee you are much stronger and much wiser.

When you focus on failures and allow yourself to become consumed with hitting a brick wall you aren’t focusing on how you can break the cycle.

Take my failed relationships for example. Now I haven’t had the best track record when it comes to relationships. The mindset you have towards them matters! Every time I’d get out of a failed relationship I’d play the sad little woe is me song on the violin. I’d say I was the problem and nobody would want me. Now I was right about something I was the problem in the way I never analyzed why it didn’t work.  I had to learn why I was choosing those people, why I continued to not go after what I deserved, and if I believe nobody worthwhile is going to come, then they won’t.

Let me also throw in my mindset about money. I made a lot of impulsive financial decisions which impacted my bank account, savings, and credit. I had the “you can’t take it with you when you’re gone mentality.” If you needed an example of blowing money fast there was a picture of me alongside negative bank statements. It took me a moment to realize that every financial decision doesn’t require an immediate response. Some require you to set on it for a couple of days, or maybe even a month.

There’s no need to feel ashamed of failures.

Sometimes we have to fall in order to grow. Failures are learning opportunities. Identify what failed before and avoid those patterns before they happen. Focus on what you can change currently and set yourself up for the future. There’s a blessing in every lesson, and if you were perfect patty your life would be pretty boring lol. Don’t let anyone try to hold something or someone you aren’t any more over your head.  So be proud of those failures, they add character. Today vow to no longer let the past consume you.  You are not the same person you were yesterday.

Thanks for reading. Stay Selfish.